Life Lately

Do you ever feel lost?

I imagine that after wayfinding for so long, a voyager may feel more lost than ever when they reach their destination. That's sort of how I feel, or how I've felt for the past few days at least. We just finished college, and I had handled a lot of our schooling over the past... I don't know, 16 years that we were in school, preschool through college? It's weird. I don't feel excited the way I thought I would.

I'm glad to be done, don't get me wrong. I didn't enjoy school. I hated it, most of the time. I just thought the accomplishment would feel different, I guess. It's kind of like when you were a kid about to turn 10 after being 9 for a whole 365 days, thinking that the double digits would make you feel so grown. It didn't, though, did it? You felt the same, only a day older at 10 years old than you were at 9 years and 364 days old.

Maybe I'll feel differently when they mail me my degree and I feel the paper in my hands, our shared victory that I had played a larger part in than anyone. A front-lines soldier finally winning the war... but what is he other than a fighter?

Now I have to discover how to be more than an academic.